III. Expositions of Matthew’s Gospel
Matthew 1:18-25
November 30, 1997
Matthew 1:18-25
November 30, 1997
The words of this text are among the most well-known in the Bible. The “birth-narratives,” as the commentators call them, are read every Christmas season in nearly every church in all of Christendom. They tell the story of the birth of the divine, the Christ, the Son of God, in the child Jesus. But they also tell a very human story as well. Joseph and Mary are real people who experienced these events in real space-time existence. They were alternately shocked, confused, dismayed, comprehending, submissive and thrilled as events unfolded. Luke tells the story of the birth of Jesus from the perspective of Mary, recording for us the angel’s announcement to Mary and her response (the “Magnificat”). But Matthew tells us of the birth from the perspective of Joseph. For example, Matthew tells us of the angel’s appearance to Joseph in a dream and traces his response, telling us nothing about Mary. Matthew’s purpose seems to be two fold: to introduce us to Joseph, telling us something of the kind of man he was, and to introduce us to the Child who is entering their (and our) world.
Joseph’s Crisis
Now the birth of Jesus Christ was as follows. When His mother Mary had been betrothed to Joseph, before they came together she was found to be with child by the Holy Spirit. (Matthew 1:18)
Matthew speaks of Mary being “betrothed” to Joseph. This introduces a concept that is foreign to our culture and will require some explanation. Marriages in those days were typically arranged by parents on behalf of their children while they were still infants. Sometimes this was carried out with the help of a professional matchmaker. The prevailing notion was that marriage was too important a decision to be left to the discretion of the young people themselves. Their passions were certainly not thought to be a reliable guide in making a match. When the time for marriage came, the young people involved seemed to have a veto power over a given candidate. But otherwise they married the one selected for them by their parents. Lest you gasp in horror, we might note that the current system in effect today, where marriages are entered on the basis of romantic feelings, which might end up being attached to most anyone, are not terribly successful in producing happy marriages either. Love, after all, is primarily a decision. We don’t choose our parents, our children, or our siblings, yet we love them, or, at least, usually do. Of course there are exceptions, as there were in arranged marriages. But the strongest loves that we have are those which grow over time, typically for those who are given to us. The older I get, and older my children get, a parental role in the selection of one’s children’s spouses looks wiser and wiser.
Once one agreed to marry the mate selected by one’s parents, one entered a period of betrothal. Betrothal was like our engagement, except it was binding. It was viewed as the first part of marriage, as Morris points out, though the couple still lived with their respective families. The betrothed could be called the “wife” of her fiancé (Gen 29:41; Deut 22:23, 24), and the man could be called the girl’s “husband” (e.g., Joel 1:8; Mt 1:19). A betrothed woman could be punished as an adulteress, whereas the punishment of an unbetrothed woman was different (Dt 22:23,24,28-29). Betrothal could only be broken by divorce. The second part of marriage was when the man brought his betrothed to his home. We are specifically told that Mary and Joseph had not yet “come together.” That she was “found to be with child” prior to this second part would be a serious offense, one which could have been punished by death, though this was not typically done in the first century. The passive voice probably reflects Joseph’s point of view, as he became aware of the situation. “She was found to be with child,” we are told. We are immediately told that Mary’s condition was “by the Holy Spirit,” but Joseph would not have known that initially. As her condition became evident, as such things inevitably do, it would have precipitated a personal crisis. Knowing how these things happen, he could only have concluded one thing - Mary had been unfaithful. He must have experienced the full range of human emotions at that time: anger at Mary for violating their marriage; disappointment and sorrow at the shattering of their plans for the future; confusion as to what to do next. How was he to handle this? What was he to do?
Joseph’s Character
And Joseph her husband, being a righteous man, and not wanting to disgrace her, desired to put her away secretly. (Matthew 1:19)
Joseph is described as a “righteous” (dikaios) man, meaning that he was “careful in his observance of the law,” says Morris (27). As one concerned for the law he might have made an example of her by taking her to court and publicly humiliating her (Dt 22). But he did not conclude that a concern for righteousness required that he deal with her harshly. Matthew tells us of this second aspect of Joseph’s character. He did not want to “disgrace” her. The righteous are gracious as well as just (Ps 37:21). He determined instead to “put her away,” a codeword for divorce (apoluo), “secretly” or privately. He did not have to take her to court. An Israelite man was merely required to hand his wife a “bill of divorce” in the presence of two witnesses and send her away (see Dt 24:1). What is impressive about this is that Joseph does not make a quick judgment, and when he does make a decision, it is one which carefully balances justice and love. Let’s look at the first of these points.
1. Joseph doesn’t act rashly. He doesn’t respond impulsively. He doesn’t lash out vindictively. As verse 20 goes on to say, he “considered this,” literally, “while he thought on these things.” He pondered this. He thought hard and long about it. He seems to be waiting for more light. He knows that he must do what is right. He is also a compassionate man, and so does not want to humiliate her more than is necessary to serve justice. So he waits, thinks, and most likely, prays. This is an aspect of Joseph’s godliness that Matthew is highlighting. It is an example that we would do well to follow. Too often we make quick judgments about things concerning which we are not capable of making an informed determination. How do I know that this is what we typically do? Because this is what we all complain of when we are on the receiving end. We say that others are concluding what they are about us because they don’t realize all the factors. We feel that it is so unfair. They condemn while they aren’t aware of this and this and that! Why not wait? Why not show patience? Why not be more humble about it? Isn’t it the height of self-righteousness and judgmentalism when we presume to quickly condemn another human being, when typically it is impossible for us to know enough to do so credibly? Joseph waits, even though as far as he is concerned there is no possibility that things could be other than they appear. We too should wait. We should give the benefit of the doubt. We should be slow to make a judgment.
2. Joseph judges precisely. There would be some who would say today that Joseph should forgive Mary and receive her back. Anyone could make a mistake. She’s young. She merely lost her head in a moment of passion. “It could happen to anyone,” they would continue. Then there are others who would take the opposite tact and argue, in effect, “off with her head.” Stone her. Drag her into court and utterly humiliate her. Make her pay severely for what she has done. She has it coming, they would maintain. Give it to her. Both of these perspectives are wrong. The tension that must be carefully balanced is that between love and justice. Joseph seeks that balance.
Yes we must be loving, but we must also be just. We must not love in a way that compromises justice. Yes we must be just, but we must also love. We must not be just in a way that compromises love. The temptation is always to throw out one at the expense of the other. That is, to love and ignore justice, or to be just and ignore love. What Joseph manages is to do the just thing while doing so in a loving manner. He is a “righteous man” we are told. He does not want to “disgrace” her. Instead he desires to “put her away secretly.” What Joseph is doing and what we must also learn to do is to maintain the tension between justice and love and not compromise one at the expense of the other. He does uphold righteousness by following through on divorcing her. She should be divorced and he determines that he will “put her away secretly.” But he is not going to do this in a way that is harsh or cruel. He is not trying to exact his pound of flesh from her. This reveals a great deal about the character of Joseph about whom we are told so little from the biblical record. In this respect he is an example to the church in our dealings with one another individually as well as our life together. It is wrong to look at church discipline, for example, as being an inherently harsh or cruel thing. “Whom the Lord loves He disciplines.” Love and discipline are not mutually exclusive. Discipline can be carried out in a way that is harsh or cruel. But it need not be. It can be done and indeed must be done in a way that has as its goal the repentance and restoration of the one who is disciplined, even as is true of a parent’s discipline of his child. Love cannot be cited as an excuse for failing to discipline. Neither can the need for discipline be an excuse for failing to love. Where there is true godliness, as in the case of Joseph, these two things will always be held in tension. We will love, but we will also vindicate righteousness. We will vindicate righteousness but we will also do so in a way that is loving rather than harsh, or mean-spirited or cruel.
Joseph’s Decision
Having carefully considered his alternatives and come to a decision, God then intervenes and redirects Joseph:
But when he had considered this, behold, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream, saying, “Joseph, son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary as your wife; for that which has been conceived in her is of the Holy Spirit. And she will bear a Son; and you shall call His name Jesus, for it is He who will save His people from their sins. Now all this took place that what was spoken by the Lord through the prophet might be fulfilled, saying, ‘Behold, the virgin shall be with child, and shall bear a son, and they shall call His name Immanuel,’ which translated means, ‘God with us.’ (Matthew 1:20-23)
We’ll come back to the theological content of these next few studies. For now we wish only to examine Joseph’s response to what he is told. The angel tells Joseph not to be afraid to take Mary as his wife. Mary, he says, is still a virgin, the child within her is the result of the miraculous work of the Holy Spirit, and He will be the Savior of His people in fulfillment of Is 7:14, Jesus, Immanuel, God with us.
How does Joseph respond to this extraordinary dream and stunning message? He responds with immediate obedience.
And Joseph arose from his sleep, and did as the angel of the Lord commanded him, and took her as his wife. (Matthew 1:24)
Joseph got up from his sleep “and did as the angel of the Lord commanded him.” He did what he was told. Rather than ending the first stage of marriage, the betrothal, through divorce, he instead proceeded to the second stage, and “took her as his wife,” that is, he took her home. They lived together from that point on as husband and wife, with one qualification:
and kept her a virgin until she gave birth to a Son; and he called His name Jesus. (Matthew 1:25)
They did not consummate the marriage until after the birth of Jesus. The imperfect tense, (“kept”) notes Allen, “is against the tradition of perpetual virginity” (in Morris, 32)
Joseph’s obedience is unquestioned and immediate. This too reveals his character. He was a man of God who submitted at once to the will of God for him. “Of course he did,” someone might say, “God spoke directly to him. There was no mistaking what God wanted him to do. We don’t have direct communication like that.” The implication of this kind of thinking is that obedience is harder for us. I would resist this line of thought for two reasons.
First, God does speak to us directly through the Bible and still we disobey Him. Our circumstances are not so different from Joseph’s as we might have thought. God tells us not to covet and still we do. God tells us not to gossip and still we do. God tells us not to steal and cheat and still we do. God tells us to pray and we still don’t. God tells us to meditate on His Word and we still don’t. We could go on and on. Clear, direct communication from God is no guarantee that we will do what we are told. Our problem, as Mark Twain observed long ago, is not what we don’t know, but what we do know and don’t do. Jesus said in the Parable of the Rich Man and Lazarus,
If they do not listen to Moses and the Prophets, neither will they be persuaded if someone rises from the dead. (Luke 16:31)
Second, obedience was costly for Joseph. Word had to have been out regarding Mary’s condition. Yet Joseph agrees to marry her even though there will be no way for him to explain the circumstances to others. At least there’ll be no way to explain without them erupting in laughter. For the rest of his life he will face rumors about the circumstances of this marriage. Even on the pages of the New Testament the accusation of the illegitimacy was hurled at Jesus. Joseph must do what he knows is right though many others will find his choice unthinkable. “Why is he doing that?” “How could he?” This marriage will cost him his reputation in the eyes of some. No doubt he will be ostracized and rejected by others. Yet, by naming the child, “Joseph officially accepted the child (cf. ‘I have called you by name, you are mine,’ Isa 43:1); this gave the child the status of a descendant of David,” says Morris (29).
Joseph submits to the will of God and embraces that which will change his life forever. Nothing will ever be the same again for Joseph. Whatever dreams or hopes he had must now take a back-seat to the needs of Jesus and His Kingdom. Make no mistake about it. This is no easy decision. Joseph must deny himself and subordinate his whole life to the requirements of God’s plan.
In this too Joseph is an example of godliness for us. Our calling, like Joseph’s, is to completely and immediately submit to God’s regardless of the cost. As was the case with Joseph, there will be a cost. That cannot be avoided. There will be opportunities lost, pleasures denied, persecution endured. Yet Joseph leaves for us an example. Unquestioning obedience is to be our way as well as his.
Joseph’s Crisis
Now the birth of Jesus Christ was as follows. When His mother Mary had been betrothed to Joseph, before they came together she was found to be with child by the Holy Spirit. (Matthew 1:18)
Matthew speaks of Mary being “betrothed” to Joseph. This introduces a concept that is foreign to our culture and will require some explanation. Marriages in those days were typically arranged by parents on behalf of their children while they were still infants. Sometimes this was carried out with the help of a professional matchmaker. The prevailing notion was that marriage was too important a decision to be left to the discretion of the young people themselves. Their passions were certainly not thought to be a reliable guide in making a match. When the time for marriage came, the young people involved seemed to have a veto power over a given candidate. But otherwise they married the one selected for them by their parents. Lest you gasp in horror, we might note that the current system in effect today, where marriages are entered on the basis of romantic feelings, which might end up being attached to most anyone, are not terribly successful in producing happy marriages either. Love, after all, is primarily a decision. We don’t choose our parents, our children, or our siblings, yet we love them, or, at least, usually do. Of course there are exceptions, as there were in arranged marriages. But the strongest loves that we have are those which grow over time, typically for those who are given to us. The older I get, and older my children get, a parental role in the selection of one’s children’s spouses looks wiser and wiser.
Once one agreed to marry the mate selected by one’s parents, one entered a period of betrothal. Betrothal was like our engagement, except it was binding. It was viewed as the first part of marriage, as Morris points out, though the couple still lived with their respective families. The betrothed could be called the “wife” of her fiancé (Gen 29:41; Deut 22:23, 24), and the man could be called the girl’s “husband” (e.g., Joel 1:8; Mt 1:19). A betrothed woman could be punished as an adulteress, whereas the punishment of an unbetrothed woman was different (Dt 22:23,24,28-29). Betrothal could only be broken by divorce. The second part of marriage was when the man brought his betrothed to his home. We are specifically told that Mary and Joseph had not yet “come together.” That she was “found to be with child” prior to this second part would be a serious offense, one which could have been punished by death, though this was not typically done in the first century. The passive voice probably reflects Joseph’s point of view, as he became aware of the situation. “She was found to be with child,” we are told. We are immediately told that Mary’s condition was “by the Holy Spirit,” but Joseph would not have known that initially. As her condition became evident, as such things inevitably do, it would have precipitated a personal crisis. Knowing how these things happen, he could only have concluded one thing - Mary had been unfaithful. He must have experienced the full range of human emotions at that time: anger at Mary for violating their marriage; disappointment and sorrow at the shattering of their plans for the future; confusion as to what to do next. How was he to handle this? What was he to do?
Joseph’s Character
And Joseph her husband, being a righteous man, and not wanting to disgrace her, desired to put her away secretly. (Matthew 1:19)
Joseph is described as a “righteous” (dikaios) man, meaning that he was “careful in his observance of the law,” says Morris (27). As one concerned for the law he might have made an example of her by taking her to court and publicly humiliating her (Dt 22). But he did not conclude that a concern for righteousness required that he deal with her harshly. Matthew tells us of this second aspect of Joseph’s character. He did not want to “disgrace” her. The righteous are gracious as well as just (Ps 37:21). He determined instead to “put her away,” a codeword for divorce (apoluo), “secretly” or privately. He did not have to take her to court. An Israelite man was merely required to hand his wife a “bill of divorce” in the presence of two witnesses and send her away (see Dt 24:1). What is impressive about this is that Joseph does not make a quick judgment, and when he does make a decision, it is one which carefully balances justice and love. Let’s look at the first of these points.
1. Joseph doesn’t act rashly. He doesn’t respond impulsively. He doesn’t lash out vindictively. As verse 20 goes on to say, he “considered this,” literally, “while he thought on these things.” He pondered this. He thought hard and long about it. He seems to be waiting for more light. He knows that he must do what is right. He is also a compassionate man, and so does not want to humiliate her more than is necessary to serve justice. So he waits, thinks, and most likely, prays. This is an aspect of Joseph’s godliness that Matthew is highlighting. It is an example that we would do well to follow. Too often we make quick judgments about things concerning which we are not capable of making an informed determination. How do I know that this is what we typically do? Because this is what we all complain of when we are on the receiving end. We say that others are concluding what they are about us because they don’t realize all the factors. We feel that it is so unfair. They condemn while they aren’t aware of this and this and that! Why not wait? Why not show patience? Why not be more humble about it? Isn’t it the height of self-righteousness and judgmentalism when we presume to quickly condemn another human being, when typically it is impossible for us to know enough to do so credibly? Joseph waits, even though as far as he is concerned there is no possibility that things could be other than they appear. We too should wait. We should give the benefit of the doubt. We should be slow to make a judgment.
2. Joseph judges precisely. There would be some who would say today that Joseph should forgive Mary and receive her back. Anyone could make a mistake. She’s young. She merely lost her head in a moment of passion. “It could happen to anyone,” they would continue. Then there are others who would take the opposite tact and argue, in effect, “off with her head.” Stone her. Drag her into court and utterly humiliate her. Make her pay severely for what she has done. She has it coming, they would maintain. Give it to her. Both of these perspectives are wrong. The tension that must be carefully balanced is that between love and justice. Joseph seeks that balance.
Yes we must be loving, but we must also be just. We must not love in a way that compromises justice. Yes we must be just, but we must also love. We must not be just in a way that compromises love. The temptation is always to throw out one at the expense of the other. That is, to love and ignore justice, or to be just and ignore love. What Joseph manages is to do the just thing while doing so in a loving manner. He is a “righteous man” we are told. He does not want to “disgrace” her. Instead he desires to “put her away secretly.” What Joseph is doing and what we must also learn to do is to maintain the tension between justice and love and not compromise one at the expense of the other. He does uphold righteousness by following through on divorcing her. She should be divorced and he determines that he will “put her away secretly.” But he is not going to do this in a way that is harsh or cruel. He is not trying to exact his pound of flesh from her. This reveals a great deal about the character of Joseph about whom we are told so little from the biblical record. In this respect he is an example to the church in our dealings with one another individually as well as our life together. It is wrong to look at church discipline, for example, as being an inherently harsh or cruel thing. “Whom the Lord loves He disciplines.” Love and discipline are not mutually exclusive. Discipline can be carried out in a way that is harsh or cruel. But it need not be. It can be done and indeed must be done in a way that has as its goal the repentance and restoration of the one who is disciplined, even as is true of a parent’s discipline of his child. Love cannot be cited as an excuse for failing to discipline. Neither can the need for discipline be an excuse for failing to love. Where there is true godliness, as in the case of Joseph, these two things will always be held in tension. We will love, but we will also vindicate righteousness. We will vindicate righteousness but we will also do so in a way that is loving rather than harsh, or mean-spirited or cruel.
Joseph’s Decision
Having carefully considered his alternatives and come to a decision, God then intervenes and redirects Joseph:
But when he had considered this, behold, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream, saying, “Joseph, son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary as your wife; for that which has been conceived in her is of the Holy Spirit. And she will bear a Son; and you shall call His name Jesus, for it is He who will save His people from their sins. Now all this took place that what was spoken by the Lord through the prophet might be fulfilled, saying, ‘Behold, the virgin shall be with child, and shall bear a son, and they shall call His name Immanuel,’ which translated means, ‘God with us.’ (Matthew 1:20-23)
We’ll come back to the theological content of these next few studies. For now we wish only to examine Joseph’s response to what he is told. The angel tells Joseph not to be afraid to take Mary as his wife. Mary, he says, is still a virgin, the child within her is the result of the miraculous work of the Holy Spirit, and He will be the Savior of His people in fulfillment of Is 7:14, Jesus, Immanuel, God with us.
How does Joseph respond to this extraordinary dream and stunning message? He responds with immediate obedience.
And Joseph arose from his sleep, and did as the angel of the Lord commanded him, and took her as his wife. (Matthew 1:24)
Joseph got up from his sleep “and did as the angel of the Lord commanded him.” He did what he was told. Rather than ending the first stage of marriage, the betrothal, through divorce, he instead proceeded to the second stage, and “took her as his wife,” that is, he took her home. They lived together from that point on as husband and wife, with one qualification:
and kept her a virgin until she gave birth to a Son; and he called His name Jesus. (Matthew 1:25)
They did not consummate the marriage until after the birth of Jesus. The imperfect tense, (“kept”) notes Allen, “is against the tradition of perpetual virginity” (in Morris, 32)
Joseph’s obedience is unquestioned and immediate. This too reveals his character. He was a man of God who submitted at once to the will of God for him. “Of course he did,” someone might say, “God spoke directly to him. There was no mistaking what God wanted him to do. We don’t have direct communication like that.” The implication of this kind of thinking is that obedience is harder for us. I would resist this line of thought for two reasons.
First, God does speak to us directly through the Bible and still we disobey Him. Our circumstances are not so different from Joseph’s as we might have thought. God tells us not to covet and still we do. God tells us not to gossip and still we do. God tells us not to steal and cheat and still we do. God tells us to pray and we still don’t. God tells us to meditate on His Word and we still don’t. We could go on and on. Clear, direct communication from God is no guarantee that we will do what we are told. Our problem, as Mark Twain observed long ago, is not what we don’t know, but what we do know and don’t do. Jesus said in the Parable of the Rich Man and Lazarus,
If they do not listen to Moses and the Prophets, neither will they be persuaded if someone rises from the dead. (Luke 16:31)
Second, obedience was costly for Joseph. Word had to have been out regarding Mary’s condition. Yet Joseph agrees to marry her even though there will be no way for him to explain the circumstances to others. At least there’ll be no way to explain without them erupting in laughter. For the rest of his life he will face rumors about the circumstances of this marriage. Even on the pages of the New Testament the accusation of the illegitimacy was hurled at Jesus. Joseph must do what he knows is right though many others will find his choice unthinkable. “Why is he doing that?” “How could he?” This marriage will cost him his reputation in the eyes of some. No doubt he will be ostracized and rejected by others. Yet, by naming the child, “Joseph officially accepted the child (cf. ‘I have called you by name, you are mine,’ Isa 43:1); this gave the child the status of a descendant of David,” says Morris (29).
Joseph submits to the will of God and embraces that which will change his life forever. Nothing will ever be the same again for Joseph. Whatever dreams or hopes he had must now take a back-seat to the needs of Jesus and His Kingdom. Make no mistake about it. This is no easy decision. Joseph must deny himself and subordinate his whole life to the requirements of God’s plan.
In this too Joseph is an example of godliness for us. Our calling, like Joseph’s, is to completely and immediately submit to God’s regardless of the cost. As was the case with Joseph, there will be a cost. That cannot be avoided. There will be opportunities lost, pleasures denied, persecution endured. Yet Joseph leaves for us an example. Unquestioning obedience is to be our way as well as his.
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